Portrait Poetry Friday: Starting with What's Real

One of my favorite workshops for elementary and middle schoolers is on portrait poems. (You can read a "poem walk" though the model poem, Shonto Begay's "Down Highway 163" here.)

The poem and painting "Down Highway 163" are featured
in Begay's book Navajo.

Writing a portrait poem requires a lot of imagination. For the third graders, who are still developing a sense of self, speaking in someone else's voice can be a challenge. What's been working for my students, I think, is providing structure for their imaginations. How?

1. Someone to look at.

I ask the teachers to gather fine art portraits from the art room for the lesson. I also bring in picture books with drawings -- mainly realistic -- of children. After we discuss Shonto Begay's portrait and accompanying poem, both titled "Down Highway 163," the classroom teacher and I put the images up around the room. Students quietly walk through our makeshift gallery, deciding which portrait they want to write about. Having an image in front of them provides structure -- tangible details to record in the poem.

2. Starting with what's real.

When we talked about the painting "Down Highway 163" as a whole class, I split our discussion into two parts. First, we listed the facts of the painting -- the things we could actually see. No guessing was allowed. There is a bag or sack in the painting. Fact. Do we know what's in it? No -- we put that kind of imagining on hold until we have all our facts.

Once we've exhausted the details of the painting, the class begins generating stories. The time for "I see" is over. Now we explore what we imagine. Who is the person in the painting? Where is she going and why? How is she feeling? What's in the sack? What happens next.

This painting by Leonardo da Vinci was one of the portraits
the children could choose.

When it's time to write, the students who need organization can make a t-chart. On one side, they'll write "I see" and list all of the things they observe in the painting or picture book image they chose. On the other side of the chart is space for "I imagine." Sometimes, I compare this to looking at the image as if it were a DVD on pause. If you hit the play button, what would happen next?

Last, I reminded students that they had an important choice to make, as poets. Did they want to narrate the poem, writing in third person and describing the story? Or would it be more effective to write in the voice of the character, the person in the portrait?

Here are some of the third grade portrait poems. You'll notice that a few students used their knowledge of stanzas (from the opposites poems lesson) to separate the "I See" elements from what they imagined about their subjects.

A student from Ms. Grim's class borrowed my Shonto Begay book, Navajo, intrigued by an image that shows a man transforming into a werewolf.

Wolf Man

After a painting by Shonto Begay

I am a sad guy without a shirt in the day time. Each hour of night I will change hairier and hairier, hungrier and hungrier. Then I get blood thirsty. Now I am the hairy beast of the woods. Attacking deer and bunnies, I go. Shredding the skin with my hard and sharp teeth. It’s getting to daytime. I am back to the shirtless me again, but lying on the grass and not knowing what happened. All I know is I like being back to a man.

Malia chose a picture from the art room. This was an artist's self-portrait, showing him painting en plein air.

Malia K.

I’m painting with my

favorite apron on.

My brushes flow smoothly over the canvas.

My blue shirt is soft to my skin.

I love painting still life,

especially the forest.

It’s very quiet. Too quiet.

I jump as a rabbit pops out of the bushes.

I look at all the animals and start to paint.

When I finish, I look at it and think…

I LOVE NATURE!

Hunter's fine art portrait was of a young boy. The portrait was close up, with a simple, dark background. Our poet had to stretch to imagine the boy's story.

Hunter M.

I see hair,

a green shirt

and a hat,

blue eyes.

I see that he is young

and I see a mouth.

He is staring at a bird

because the bird

is feeding her babies.

He is feeling interested

because he has never seen

a bird feeding its babies.

Hannah also chose a fine art portrait. This one was of a girl. Hannah used the I See (stanza 1) /I Imagine (stanzas 2 & 3) strategy for her poem.

Hannah L.

The Dress-up Girl

I am a little black girl

wearing a white frilly dress.

A necklace hangs from my neck.

A bracelet hangs from my wrist.

I have dark brown eyes.

I throw down my book, losing my page.

I change into my favorite dress.

I am supposed to read, but I don’t.

My necklace flies over my head.

My bracelet slides onto my wrist.

I am the dress-up girl.

Oh, no! Mom has come.

She looks disappointed.

I hang my head with a slight frown.

I am in trouble but it was worth it.

I am the dress-up girl.

I can't remember which painting Cole used for his poem, but the poem stands alone. Once again, you can see how stanza one (I See) is a jumping off point for a powerful stanza two (I Imagine).

Cole E.

He is wearing a

brown jacket, brown

shirt with a beard

and a scar on his neck.

He is a wanted man.
He’s been running away.

He lives in the desert

or maybe the attic.

Will he get caught?

Will he get caught?

No. He keeps running

from town so he can

get a better life in

a different place, a

different time.

I was so impressed with the Northfield poets' insights into human nature. I think they impressed themselves, too! More portrait poems on Monday.

Enjoy your Poetry Friday. Ed at Think Kid, Think! is hosting the poetry party today. I see that Ed makes great use of technology on his website. I imagine Ed typing away, planning some high-tech poetry project for us to enjoy today.

Portrait Poems Part 3

Last week, we looked at writing portrait poems with elementary schoolers.Part one of the lesson is here, where I introduce the concept of starting with "what I see" in a picture or newspaper photo, then adding "what I imagine" to extend the poem.

Part two of the lesson is here. It includes a model pairing of painting and poem by artist Shonto Begay.

Picasso is a great choice for the
portrait poem workshop. The image
invites storytelling.

In some schools, the art teacher will provide fine art portraits for the kids to choose from. I'll share some art-response portraits from fifth grade students tomorrow.

At Northfield Elementary, we like to display the portrait poems with their images. This means the children are asked to bring in newspaper or magazine clippings. Two rules: it has to be an image of a person, it should not be someone you know. We can bend this rule for celebrities. I don't like the students to write in response to photos of themselves or family. (See part one of the lesson for my reasoning.)

I recommend having extra photos. Newspaper clippings work best, because they often have a story built into the image. In finding good photos, look for expression in the face or body language, a person in action, or an interesting setting or "props" within the image.

When the students are ready to write, some like to use a T-chart for brainstorming: "I see" or "Facts" listed on one side, "I can't see" or "Imagination" on the other.

Kyle's portrait is also a narrative poem. I think he was inspired by our conversation about Shonto Begay's painting, "Down Highway 163." This poet has a natural sense of rhythm.

Run Away Slave

by Kyle S.

I've been working so hard

all day and night

but now I get to run

away from my king's sight.

I've been running through forests.

I've been running through fields.

I've been swimming through rivers.

Ouch, there's an eel.

And now I'm in a cave

with rocks and a boulder.

Oh NO! A dead end.

I must roll the rocks over.

Yay! Look, there's an exit

behind all of these rocks.

Out in the sun

and away from the locks.

Oh NO! It's my king

with the guards on his wing.

Now, the chase is on.

 

With a poet this advanced (even in third grade!) I feel comfortable making a comment on the eel line: "Does this funny line fit the tone of your poem?" Kyle will think that over when we revise.

Two students had the same photo -- a magazine ad showing a girl with a jar of fireflies. The class got to hear both poems. It was fascinating to see what different responses each poet came up with. Here is one (I added line breaks):

As She Sits

by Katie T.

As she sits on the stone fence,

her face gleams with light.

She held a jar

with rocks and plants plus light.

What is that glow in the jar?

Then fireflies shot out.

Her face lit up.

She watched them fly free.

In the darkness an owl hoots,

but she still watched.

The lid was in her hand.

A firefly landed on the lid.

The gold color shined bright

from the light.

The dark doesn't scare her.

animals.howstuffworks.com

The class talked about the owl -- an addition from Katie's imagination. There was no owl in the starting image.

Abby wrote in response to a post card I brought. It's a photo from a series of famous women. This one was of a statue of Sacagawea in Portland.

I See a Woman

by Abby Y.

I see a woman

reaching out

feeling her furry dress

with a stray coat

that's very gray.

The wind blowing

through her thick hair

with a baby on her back

standing there like she

is a frozen statue

not happy.

I read somewhere that Sacagawea is the subject of more U.S. statues than any other single person.

We'll look at some fifth grade portraits in response to fine art tomorrow.

Portrait Poems Part 2

Happy Poetry Friday, Friends!

Some quick news, before today's poetry lesson. This week, I found out that my ekphrastic poem, "Fringe," was a finalist for the 2012 Rita Dove Poetry Awards. I am thrilled!

Those of you who remember me writing about the mud run I'm doing with my teenage son, it's this weekend. Fingers crossed that I survive.

Last, if you are in the Westminster, MD area, I am reading at the Carroll County Arts Council Thursday 5/24 at 7 PM. Poet Bruce Sager will be my partner in rhyme.

Yesterday, I introduced portrait poems to the Northfield third grade. We looked at a student poem in response to The Scream. (Yesterday's post, part one of the lesson, is here.)

Today, we are going to take a poem walk through the model poem, Shonto Begay's "Down Highway 163." About a year ago, I exchanged emails with Mr. Begay regarding this lesson. If you'd like to read our conversation, that post is here. I am grateful for his permission to share his work.

First, I share a little of Mr. Begay's background, which kids (and I) find both heart-breaking and fascinating. Then, we look at his painting, "Down Highway 163."

We list the facts of the painting, all of the things we can see. Kids get the idea quickly. We can say the person is cold because she is wrapped in a blanket and there is snow. We can't assume the person is homeless. That's not a fact we can see.

FYI -- if you live on the East Coast, as I do, your students might mistake that butte in the background for a building or an orange cloud. I usually take a minute to tell them what a butte is, often showing them a photograph of the real Highway 163 in Utah.

After we have all our facts, we can start the fun part of this exercise...imagining. I've had classes come up with many crazy and wonderful stories about this painting. In a recent one, the woman's sack was filled with cash she'd been saving for a long time. She was hitching a ride on the truck so she could get to the used car lot and buy her own car!

Now, it's time to see what the artist imagined about this character.

DOWN HIGHWAY 163
by Shonto Begay

The old lady in the back of the truck
Has seen days much colder
Someone's grandmother
On the highway towards Kayenta
Only her face shows from a faded blanket (5)
Her features are strong
Maybe she is related to the people in the front
Laughing and warm
Or maybe she is catching a ride to the trading post
She may even be returning (10)
From the health clinic in Monument Valley
The back of the truck is cold
Among old spare tires and chains
Shovels and bare metal box
She is no stranger to Old Man Winter (15)
She has seen many winters
It has been colder

Posted with permission of the author.

As I mentioned with last week's poem walk, I let the students guide the discussion. I have my "hoped for" points in mind. Most of the time, when I ask kids to share their favorite parts of the poem, the children will pull these lines out themselves.

Line 1: If students are stuck with their own poems, they can use this opening line strategy -- tell who, tell where.

Line 2: We'll come back to the connotations of the word "cold" by the end of the discussion and see how it threads through the poem. Many elementary schoolers have heard the idiom, "giving the cold shoulder" or understand (thanks to reality TV) "that was cold" is an appropriate response to an insult. The point is, "cold" can be used to describe disrespectful treatment -- not just the temperature. This is not an easy idea for all third graders, some of whom are concrete thinkers, so I'll need to spend time on this concept -- with their teacher's help.

Line 3: At some point in the discussion, I will ask, "Would you treat your grandmother this way?"

Line 6: How do we know this person is strong (see final two lines)? The students find this line as evidence. We talk about the idea that when a poet calls someone's facial features -- outer expression -- strong, that poet is suggesting the person is also strong on the inside.

Line 7-8: See my question about Line 3. We start to realize that it's pretty shocking that this elderly woman has been stuck in the back of a truck -- in the middle of winter -- by the drivers. Her family? We might talk about the idea that in Begay's Navajo culture, elders are treated with great respect.

Line 11: Some children will pick up on the idea that the woman might be sick. That makes us more bothered that she is in the back of the truck and not being cared for.

Line 13-14: Since we discussed the junk in the back of the truck (tire, shovel, box) when we looked at the painting, the students understand the metaphor here. If our woman is back there with the trash, how is she being treated? Like trash.

Line 15: Some children have not heard of "Old Man Winter." Explain that it's an expression similar to Mother Nature or Jack Frost.

Lines 16-17: We come back to the thread of "cold" layers in the poem now, both the weather and the treatment of this woman. The children will point out, when I ask them what they like about these two lines, that the woman is a survivor. They "get" that she has been through worse winters/experiences and will live through this.

After we read the poem one more time, I shower the kids with praise. It takes a lot of deep thinking to discuss a poem like "Down Highway 163" and they've done a great job.

At Northfield, we ask the kids to bring newspaper and magazine clippings for their portraits. The teachers and I usually bring in extras. While a simple portrait will work, I like to look for images that have story potential -- details, style of dress, or a setting that makes me say, "What's happening here?"

If the kids get stuck while they're writing, I suggest that they use Shonto Begay's strategy. Begin a new thread of imagining with the word "maybe."

In Mary's poem, there is a subtle suggestion of conflict between the girl going to a dance and the parents taking her photo.

A Pretty Teenager Going to a Dance

by Mary

My long blue dress with

brown curly hair and sparkly earrings

with the trees in the background

Me posing for a picture

But I want to go to a dance

to laugh and smile

dance with my friends

It's my first time so let me

have fun and laugh

talk with my friends

It will be the best time I ever

had with all my friends and me

Zoe's poem captures a friendship between two very different girls. (There was only one girl in the picture Zoe wrote in response to.)

My Crazy Friend Daisy

by Zoe

I see my friend

and what do I think

Well, I think she's crazy

in that pose

With her glasses on

doing her funny dance

I'm just sitting there watching

What a sight!

What a crazy friend.

But she still is fun

that funny friend of mine

in that pose

Oh, what a great friend!

Amber wrote about a fashion photograph.

Fancy Model Or...

by Amber

Walking on glass.

Wow, so hard.

How can she do it?

Oh, I don't know!

Or maybe a model

looking so cute.

Fancy necklace or bracelet or dress.

Fancy model walking on glass.

Feeling proud like "Wow, I'm doing it."

Walking up and down

above the clouds

like the queen of the word

or space.

Glasses in her hand, hand on her hip

seeing herself

lovely and sweet

like a professional model.

Oh, she is.

What is she thinking?

Looking up, not down,

focusing on her.

Her her her her her

just her.

Getting dizzy spinning around

turning, spinning, walking, turning.

Lilly's magazine clipping was simple: A young girl with a seashell by her ear.

The Waves

by Lilly

Ffffff

Fffff

Listen

Fffff

The waves are talking

I can hear them well

Ffffff

Through the shell the waves

are coming

I almost think they're coming

at me

Fffff

The waves are talking.

I'll have a few more wonderful portrait poems on Monday, and then we'll move on to food poems. Yum!

Today's Poetry Friday host is Katya at Write. Sketch. Repeat. Thank, Katya!

Portrait Poems Part 1

One of my students' favorite workshops -- not matter what grade they are in -- is on portrait poems.

The backbone of the lesson is simple. We use an image of a person to gather concrete facts, a list of things we know or can see. Then, we take the same image and let our imaginations go crazy as we make up a story about the person.

Try using images of people students don't know, magazine clippings
or portraits like this one of Ann Boleyn from englishhistory.net.

I like this exercise for several reasons. First, it teaches point of view on more than one level. As writers, many of the students will opt to write in the voice of the character. That makes the portrait poem something like acting. On the human level, writing a portrait poem teaches compassion. For some children, it's a stretch to imagine what the person in that photo might be thinking about or feeling. Writing a poem is a safe way to wonder about someone else's point of view.

The second lesson lesson that portrait poems teach is more subtle. Because we are taking what we can see (the facts) and then imagining what is unseen (what happens next, or the person's feelings), the portrait poem mirrors the process of writing poetry. Poets take concrete experiences and present them in a way that creates emotional impact or some kind of revelation. That's exactly what we do in a portrait poem.

I'm worth how much?!

I was working on portraits with the Northfield third graders earlier this month, when the Edvard Munch painting The Scream was in the news. A version of the painting (there are four) recently sold at auction for just under $120 million.

One of my students wrote a portrait painting on The Scream a few years ago.

Scream (Response to “The Scream”)

by James, Grade 4

The frightened man on

the bridge in black

he screams as the bridge

opens while he’s on it

in the front of the

bay, the boat goes

by and two people walk

toward him, helping him

off the bridge and running

as he yells to his

family as they scream

in horror as their son

almost died as the

bridge went up and down.

The Northfield third graders and I looked at The Scream and read the poem. We talked about which elements of the poem were facts (the frightened man, the bridge, the water, the boat, two people) and which were the poet's imagination (the drawbridge, the idea that the two people are helping, the family, the idea that he almost died).

This student model sets us up well for discussing another painting/poem pair, Shonto Begay's "Down Highway 163." You can find them in Begay's wonderful book, Navajo. 

We'll look at that tomorrow. For now, here are some third grade portrait poems.

Thanks to Northfield's family and staff (and poets!) for allowing me to share these poems. You'll notice that some of the students have opted for one stanza on "what I see" and a separate stanza for "what I imagine," as in this first poem.

I See a Family

I see a family

playing on the sand

two small boys

walking through the water

the water is rushing up

and covering their feet.

Maybe the mom is worried

and scared.

The current might pull

her sons into the dark

cold sea.

Richard's poem is literally immersed in what the speaker of the poem is doing.

Splash

by Richard G.

Splash

arms flailing

legs kicking

having fun in the water

being almost weightless

and perfectly round

bubbles floating

to the surface

I don't realize how

much time passes by

and suddenly

I hear my dad

and mom say

It's time to go!

I love how Noah imagines the complex emotions of an astronaut -- talk about a different point of view than your own!

Untitled

by Noah H.

The man is very happy.

He finished his job

middle aged man

is forty years old,

is an astronaut.

Loved space.

A little dizzy.

Wants to go again.

Happy to see his

family. Happy to

go home.

It will be clear to you which famous landmark was in the photograph Alex wrote about.

Waving "Hello!"

by Alex N.

Foreigner kids

waving hello

to a statue of freedom.

Entering America.

Maybe they're happy.

They could be frightened.

England or France,

where are they from?

Children are waving because

they're entering

a new life and a new world.

They've traveled through storms

and the coldest of nights.

They're finally there.

Whew!

What a delight.

Look for the second half of the portrait poem lesson, including a "poem walk" through "Down Highway 163" tomorrow.

Interning with a Poet: Guest Post

"I wish I could go back in time and store some of my third grade creativity in a jar." After spending time with the third graders at Northfield Elementary, this thought engraved itself in my head for days.

My name is Alissa Bennett and I am a student at St. Paul’s School for Girls in Brooklandville, Maryland. At my school, the senior class participates in Senior Projects. The Senior Project program gives seniors the opportunity to intern with someone whose field of work they find interesting. For my Senior Project I chose to work with Mrs. Shovan because I enjoy creative writing and one of my favorite ways to express myself is through poetry.

The time spent at Northfield Elementary this past week has been a wonderful experience for me. It was nice to see the students’ excitement when it came to writing poems and learning new information about poetry they did not know before. [Note from L.S. -- this poetry residency was sponsored by the Maryland State Arts Council and Northfield's PTA.]

My favorite lesson was when the students looked at a photo and painting. [Full lesson description is here.] Mrs. Shovan would display the image and ask the students to first state only the facts about the portrait. Then they would imagine what might be happening in the portrait. I loved hearing all of the students’ creative ideas, ranging from alien abduction to dangerous escape stories.

I taught one of these lessons also. Though it was my first time teaching, and I was really nervous, I absolutely loved it! Being able to communicate with students as a teacher is a memory that I will value forever.

The poems that the students wrote were a delight to read, too. One poem that sticks out in my mind was written by Daniel Y. The poem that he wrote was during a lesson on opposites, which I was not there for. Luckily, I got the chance to read a lot of the students’ opposite poems.

Daniel’s poem sticks out in my mind because quite a few of the opposite poems I read were about what they students liked opposed to what they didn’t like. Daniel chose to write about big beautiful things opposed to small beautiful things.

I loved all of the examples and imagery that Daniel used in his poem. The diction that he used also was nothing less than beautiful itself. His poem reads as follows:

Big Things are Beautiful
by Daniel Y.
Grade 3

 Big things are beautiful,
like the dark, deep universe.
The ocean that waves,
and the Earth that spins.
The beautiful redwood tree that
stands with me.


Small things are beautiful,
like a bright green leaf.
A seed that grows,
and a pencil that writes,
A grain of sand that I play with at
the beach.

Read the lesson description and link to model poem here.

Thank you, Alissa, for the post. And thanks again to Northfield E.S. for including Alissa in this residency, and for giving us permission to share the students' work.

Poetry Friday: Teaching Voice

It happens at every writers' conference. An audience member asks the guest editor or agent what he looks for in a book. He says, "Voice."

"How would you define voice?" is the follow up question. Answers range from a succinct non-answer, "I know it when I hear it," to a rambling response while the agent squirms in her seat.

Voice is difficult to define, yet as readers we do have an ear for when a character's voice sounds true to itself.

Voice is also part of the 6+1 Writing Traits curriculum. So how do you teach it?

This school year, I brought back a lesson in portrait poems, using fine art images and magazine clippings for inspiration. The full portrait poem lesson is here.

Since I last posted the lesson, I've used PF blogger Amy LV's "Face Poem" as an additional model. 

The students get really into it! First, we look at an image and talk about the facts we see. Next, we spend time imagining -- what's this person's story. (One of my Northfield third grade classes imagined that the grandfather in Amy's picture was a time traveler and the baby he held was himself.) Last, we read and discuss the accompanying poem.

When it's time to write, we follow the same steps. Facts first, then imagination. I can't explain why it works, but it does.

My intern from St. Paul's School for Girls, (hi, Alissa!) and I were whispering about the poem, "A Quote from Gaga" in the back of the classroom. How does a third grader step outside of her own experience and write in the voice of a superstar?

A Quote from Gaga 
by Madi M.
Grade 3

Stylist! Stylist!

Where are you?!

I need a new outfit

For my photo shoot.

I need you to shop

‘Til you drop!

I need a new motorcycle

As a prop.

I need bright red lipstick

and shiny black kicks.

I need long black gloves,

And please, no doves.

My hair needs to be teased

And I need stockings to cover my knees.

The table is out of forks

And I need my black shorts.

I need my hair dyed

And none of this will be denied.

Did you just say, “No?”

Well!

You’re not invited to my show!

Hah!

Mackenzie brought an unusual image with her. The opening lines describe the magazine clipping she used. Then, the poem led Mackenzie into a fantasy scenario.  What an imagination. This poem is written in third person (both first and third were options for the portrait poems).

Untitled

by Mackenzie D.

Grade 3

Putting her hand in a green

glowing ball, wanting to have done

this all her life.

Touching it, feeling a hard

but soft thing, making the whole thing glow.

The light shining down

making the ball brighter.

Lines seem to burst out, but

go back in.

Sparks shooting out like a fire.

Her shirt’s already green, but it

seems as if the glow makes it greener.

Everyone crowding around her now,

wanting to do the same.

She gets bigger and bigger as

she takes her hand out,

then she gets smaller.

I will post more portrait poems over the next few days. Thanks again to Northfield Elementary and its families for giving me permission to share the students' amazing work.

And thanks to wonderful Toby for hosting today's Poetry Friday round-up.